DINFOS VCOMM Morale Central
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Military One Source
USO
National Military Family Association
USA Jobs
Thousand Thanks
Salute Our Services
Married to the Military
Basic Training: How to Make the Most of Day-to-Day Challenges
Author unknown
Learn about the military
"Educating myself was a huge help. I read everything I could find on programs that pertained to my husband. He bought me a book about pilots, and what their lives are like. This all helped me to be more understanding when he couldn't call as often as we both hoped, or when we'd have to deal with last-minute travel changes."
Stay positive
"Being a military spouse is not easy, but staying as positive as possible can really help you through it."
Don't "rank" friends or others
"Hold your head high no matter what your husband's rank is. Each and every job is important. They depend on one another! When my husband and I move and meet new people, rank never ever comes into the picture. The friends we make are dear to us because of who they are in the inside, not what is on their shoulder or sleeve."
Be flexible!
"My favorite quote is, 'Always flexible. We have to be,' from Semper Gumby. As an example, I had chosen a wedding date and planned our ceremony, but it wasn't until three days beforehand that everything was a 'go.' That's when my husband called to say he was on his way home."
Learn when to compromise
"While all relationships are difficult at times and compromises have to be made, women should not compromise beyond their limitations to make the relationship work. There is a line between compromises you have to make because your boyfriend or husband is in the military, and compromises you are asked to make because of unfair expectations he expresses about a relationship. A woman dating a military man [or married to a military man] should be strong enough in her character to recognize that line."
Make new friends, but keep the old
"Don't turn your back on your old friends just because you have a new life. It will get harder to stay in touch, but the time you take to work at those friendships will pay off when you do get to go 'home.'"
Get organized!
"When it's time to move, I always make a folder with information I've printed from the installation's Web Site. It's filled with emergency numbers, command numbers, information on utilities, the claims office phone number, the inbound shipment's phone number and more. Then, I throw in a couple of sheets of paper and a pencil. That way all the information we need is in one place."
Separate the needs from the wants
"Make a checklist of things you're going to want. Depending on how long your things will be in storage and where you're moving, you may want or need seasonal items."
Check the local news
"Find out if the newspaper from the area is online. You'll be able to look up apartments or houses to rent, as well as jobs if you want to work. Most times you can have it emailed daily."
Get references
"Ask your landlords for a written letter of recommendation. Keep the originals in your files, and make copies for potential future landlords. Be sure, also, to keep a list of their phone numbers, addresses and management company names for quick reference. You don't want to lose out on a great place because you don't have that information handy."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What Military Wives Are Made Of
Author Unknown
It was just another harried Wednesday afternoon trip to the commissary (grocery store on military bases). My husband was off teaching young men to fly. My daughters were going about their daily activities knowing I would return to them at the appointed time, bearing, among other things, their favorite fruit snacks, frozen pizza, and all the little extras that never had to be written down on a grocery list. My grocery list, by the way, was in my 16-month-old daughter's mouth, and I was lamenting the fact that the next four aisles of needed items would wait while extracting the last of my list from my daughter's mouth, when I nearly ran over an old man.
This man clearly had no appreciation for the fact that I had 45 minutes left to finish the grocery shopping, pick up my 4-year old from tumbling class, and get to school, where my 12-year-old and her carpool mates would be waiting.
I knew men didn't belong in a commissary, and this old guy was no exception. He stood in front of the soap selection staring blankly, as if he'd never had to choose a bar of soap in his life. I was ready to bark an order at him when I realized there was a tear on his face.
Instantly, this grocery aisle roadblock transformed into a human..."Can I help you find something?" I asked. He hesitated, and then told me he was looking for soap.
"Any one in particular?" I continued.
"Well, I'm trying to find my wife's brand of soap." I started to loan him my cell phone to call her when he said, "She died a year ago, and I just want to smell her again."
Chills ran down my spine. I don't think the 22,000-pound Mother of all Bombs could have had the same impact. As tears welled up in my eyes, my half-eaten grocery list didn't seem so important. Neither did fruit snacks or frozen pizza.
I spent the remainder of my time in the commissary that day listening to a man tell the story of how important his wife was to him -- how she took care of their children while he served our country. A retired, decorated World War II pilot who flew missions to protect Americans still needed the protection of a woman who served him at home.
My life was forever changed that day. Every time my husband works too late or leaves before the crack of dawn, I try to remember the sense of importance I felt that day in the commissary.
Some times the monotony of laundry, housecleaning, grocery shopping, and taxi driving leaves military wives feeling empty -- the kind of emptiness that is rarely fulfilled when our husbands come home and don't want to or can't talk about work.
We need to be reminded, at times; of the important role we fill for our family and for our country. Over the years, I've talked a lot about military spouses...how special they are and the price they pay for freedom too. The funny thing is; most military spouses don't consider themselves different from other spouses. They do what they have to do, bound together not by blood or merely friendship, but with a shared spirit whose origin is in the very essence of what love truly is. Is there truly a difference? I think there is. You have to decide for yourself...
Other spouses get married and look forward to building equity in a home and putting down family roots. Military spouses get married and know they'll live in base housing or rent, and their roots must be short so they can be transplanted frequently.
Other spouses decorate a home with flair and personality that will last a lifetime. Military spouses decorate a home with flare tempered with the knowledge that no two base houses have the same size windows or same size rooms.
Curtains have to be flexible and multiple sets are a plus. Furniture must fit like puzzle pieces.
Other spouses have living rooms that are immaculate and seldom used. Military spouses have immaculate living room/dining room combos. The coffee table got a scratch or two moving from Germany, but it still looks pretty good.
Other spouses say goodbye to their spouse for a business trip and know they won't see them for a week. They are lonely, but can survive. Military spouses say good-bye to their deploying spouse and know they won't see them for months, or a year, or longer. They are lonely, but will survive.
Other spouses, when a washer hose blows off, call Maytag and then write a check out for having the hose reconnected. Military spouses have to cut the water off and fix it themselves.
Other spouses get used to saying "hello" to friends they see all the time. Military spouses get used to saying "goodbye" to friends made the last two years.
Other spouses worry about whether their child will be class president next year. Military spouses worry about whether their child will be accepted in yet another school next year and whether that school will be the worst in the city...again.
Other spouses can count on spouse participation in special events...birthdays, anniversaries, concerts, football games, graduation, and even the birth of a child. Military spouses only count on each other; because they realize that the flag has to come first if freedom is to survive. It has to be that way.
Other spouses put up yellow ribbons when the troops are imperiled across the globe and take them down when the troops come home. Military spouses wear yellow ribbons around their hearts and they never go away.
Other spouses worry about being late for mom's Thanksgiving dinner. Military spouses worry about getting back from Japan in time for dad's funeral.
The television program showing an elderly lady putting a card down in front of a long, black wall that has names on it touches other spouses. The card simply says, "Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. You would have been sixty today." A military spouse is the lady with the card, and the wall is the Vietnam Memorial.
I would NEVER say military spouses are better than other spouses. But I will say there is a difference. I will say, without hesitation, that military spouses pay just as high a price for freedom as do their active duty husbands and wives.
Perhaps the price they pay is even higher. Dying in service to our country isn't near as hard as loving someone who has died in service to our country, and having to live without them.
God bless our military spouses for all they freely give.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
You are a military wife if...
..you can unpack a house and have everything in place in 48 hours
..you string concertina wire to keep the neighbor's kids out of your flower beds
..your husband's work and dress clothes cost more than yours do
..you've changed more oil and mowed more lawns than your husband because he's never there to do it himself
..you use a crook-neck flashlight with a red lens during power outages because it's the only one you can ever find in the house
..your children say "hoo ah" or "roger that" instead of "ok"
..you know that it's normal to light shoe polish on fire and that the best way to spit-shine boots is cotton balls
..your husband does a route recon and takes a GPS for a trip to the mall
..you only write in pencil because EVERYTHING is subject to change
..you need a translator to talk to your civilian friends, only because they have no idea what DFAS, AER, TDY, ACS, NPD, PCS, and ETS mean
..you have a larger selection of curtains than Wal-Mart does
..you can remember where you kept the Scotch tape in your last house, but unfortunately, not in this one
..you mark time in duty stations, not years
..you refer to friends not only by name but by the state that they live in
..you know that "back home" doesn't mean at the house you live in now
..you tear up when you hear "Proud to Be An American," even though you've heard it 50 times by now
..you know that a 2 month separation IS short, no matter what your civilian friends say
..you ALWAYS know when payday is and get ticked off if there are more than 2 weekends during that pay period
..you know better than to go to the PX or commissary between 11:30 and 1:30 unless it's a life or death emergency
..you show your military ID to the greeter at Wal-Mart
..you know that any reference to "sand" or a "box" describes NTC at Ft. Irwin, not your kid's backyard toys
..you know that "Ft. Puke" is a completely accurate description of Ft. Polk
..you find yourself explaining your husband's LES to him
..you have enough camouflage in your house to wallpaper the White House
..you don't have to think about what time 21:30 is
..you've ever been referred to as "Household 6"
..you're the TC, not a backseat driver
..you start ripping open MREs and looking for the M&Ms when you run out of Halloween candy
..you can't remember the last time you saw a doctor who wasn't wearing BDUs
..you've ever had a pet named Scout, Ranger or Sergeant
..the local dry cleaner knows you by your first name
..it only cost you $25 to have a child
..you find that a large number of your clothes and household items are olive drab or loam, even though you never planned it that way
..you pick apart uniforms on TV and in the movies, even though you used to yell at your husband for doing the same thing
..you know what "pogey bait" is and which kinds everyone in your husband's platoon prefers
..you wish you could go to CIF to DX your old stuff like your husband can
..you've learned to sleep through the sounds of tanks, planes, helicopters and artillery simulators
..you give your kids a hand receipt when they take your Tupperware to school
..you can hate military life but be terrified to leave it all in the same breath
..you defend your lifestyle no matter how bad things get because you know there's no other life for you!
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
A Military Spouse's Prayer
Author Unknown
Lord,
Give me the strength of heart to see
The difference in duty and his love for me.
Give me the understanding to know
That when duty calls, he must go.
Give me the patience to know in my heart
That he is serving his country and doing his part.
Give me the strength to carry on
When he's working late or must be gone.
Give me a task to do each day
To fill the time while he is away.
Give me others who can share
The ups and downs and who'll really care.
Give me the wisdom to get me through
When I'm not quite sure of what to do.
And Lord, while our family is here
Keep us healthy, safe and full of cheer.
Author unknown
Learn about the military
"Educating myself was a huge help. I read everything I could find on programs that pertained to my husband. He bought me a book about pilots, and what their lives are like. This all helped me to be more understanding when he couldn't call as often as we both hoped, or when we'd have to deal with last-minute travel changes."
Stay positive
"Being a military spouse is not easy, but staying as positive as possible can really help you through it."
Don't "rank" friends or others
"Hold your head high no matter what your husband's rank is. Each and every job is important. They depend on one another! When my husband and I move and meet new people, rank never ever comes into the picture. The friends we make are dear to us because of who they are in the inside, not what is on their shoulder or sleeve."
Be flexible!
"My favorite quote is, 'Always flexible. We have to be,' from Semper Gumby. As an example, I had chosen a wedding date and planned our ceremony, but it wasn't until three days beforehand that everything was a 'go.' That's when my husband called to say he was on his way home."
Learn when to compromise
"While all relationships are difficult at times and compromises have to be made, women should not compromise beyond their limitations to make the relationship work. There is a line between compromises you have to make because your boyfriend or husband is in the military, and compromises you are asked to make because of unfair expectations he expresses about a relationship. A woman dating a military man [or married to a military man] should be strong enough in her character to recognize that line."
Make new friends, but keep the old
"Don't turn your back on your old friends just because you have a new life. It will get harder to stay in touch, but the time you take to work at those friendships will pay off when you do get to go 'home.'"
Get organized!
"When it's time to move, I always make a folder with information I've printed from the installation's Web Site. It's filled with emergency numbers, command numbers, information on utilities, the claims office phone number, the inbound shipment's phone number and more. Then, I throw in a couple of sheets of paper and a pencil. That way all the information we need is in one place."
Separate the needs from the wants
"Make a checklist of things you're going to want. Depending on how long your things will be in storage and where you're moving, you may want or need seasonal items."
Check the local news
"Find out if the newspaper from the area is online. You'll be able to look up apartments or houses to rent, as well as jobs if you want to work. Most times you can have it emailed daily."
Get references
"Ask your landlords for a written letter of recommendation. Keep the originals in your files, and make copies for potential future landlords. Be sure, also, to keep a list of their phone numbers, addresses and management company names for quick reference. You don't want to lose out on a great place because you don't have that information handy."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
What Military Wives Are Made Of
Author Unknown
It was just another harried Wednesday afternoon trip to the commissary (grocery store on military bases). My husband was off teaching young men to fly. My daughters were going about their daily activities knowing I would return to them at the appointed time, bearing, among other things, their favorite fruit snacks, frozen pizza, and all the little extras that never had to be written down on a grocery list. My grocery list, by the way, was in my 16-month-old daughter's mouth, and I was lamenting the fact that the next four aisles of needed items would wait while extracting the last of my list from my daughter's mouth, when I nearly ran over an old man.
This man clearly had no appreciation for the fact that I had 45 minutes left to finish the grocery shopping, pick up my 4-year old from tumbling class, and get to school, where my 12-year-old and her carpool mates would be waiting.
I knew men didn't belong in a commissary, and this old guy was no exception. He stood in front of the soap selection staring blankly, as if he'd never had to choose a bar of soap in his life. I was ready to bark an order at him when I realized there was a tear on his face.
Instantly, this grocery aisle roadblock transformed into a human..."Can I help you find something?" I asked. He hesitated, and then told me he was looking for soap.
"Any one in particular?" I continued.
"Well, I'm trying to find my wife's brand of soap." I started to loan him my cell phone to call her when he said, "She died a year ago, and I just want to smell her again."
Chills ran down my spine. I don't think the 22,000-pound Mother of all Bombs could have had the same impact. As tears welled up in my eyes, my half-eaten grocery list didn't seem so important. Neither did fruit snacks or frozen pizza.
I spent the remainder of my time in the commissary that day listening to a man tell the story of how important his wife was to him -- how she took care of their children while he served our country. A retired, decorated World War II pilot who flew missions to protect Americans still needed the protection of a woman who served him at home.
My life was forever changed that day. Every time my husband works too late or leaves before the crack of dawn, I try to remember the sense of importance I felt that day in the commissary.
Some times the monotony of laundry, housecleaning, grocery shopping, and taxi driving leaves military wives feeling empty -- the kind of emptiness that is rarely fulfilled when our husbands come home and don't want to or can't talk about work.
We need to be reminded, at times; of the important role we fill for our family and for our country. Over the years, I've talked a lot about military spouses...how special they are and the price they pay for freedom too. The funny thing is; most military spouses don't consider themselves different from other spouses. They do what they have to do, bound together not by blood or merely friendship, but with a shared spirit whose origin is in the very essence of what love truly is. Is there truly a difference? I think there is. You have to decide for yourself...
Other spouses get married and look forward to building equity in a home and putting down family roots. Military spouses get married and know they'll live in base housing or rent, and their roots must be short so they can be transplanted frequently.
Other spouses decorate a home with flair and personality that will last a lifetime. Military spouses decorate a home with flare tempered with the knowledge that no two base houses have the same size windows or same size rooms.
Curtains have to be flexible and multiple sets are a plus. Furniture must fit like puzzle pieces.
Other spouses have living rooms that are immaculate and seldom used. Military spouses have immaculate living room/dining room combos. The coffee table got a scratch or two moving from Germany, but it still looks pretty good.
Other spouses say goodbye to their spouse for a business trip and know they won't see them for a week. They are lonely, but can survive. Military spouses say good-bye to their deploying spouse and know they won't see them for months, or a year, or longer. They are lonely, but will survive.
Other spouses, when a washer hose blows off, call Maytag and then write a check out for having the hose reconnected. Military spouses have to cut the water off and fix it themselves.
Other spouses get used to saying "hello" to friends they see all the time. Military spouses get used to saying "goodbye" to friends made the last two years.
Other spouses worry about whether their child will be class president next year. Military spouses worry about whether their child will be accepted in yet another school next year and whether that school will be the worst in the city...again.
Other spouses can count on spouse participation in special events...birthdays, anniversaries, concerts, football games, graduation, and even the birth of a child. Military spouses only count on each other; because they realize that the flag has to come first if freedom is to survive. It has to be that way.
Other spouses put up yellow ribbons when the troops are imperiled across the globe and take them down when the troops come home. Military spouses wear yellow ribbons around their hearts and they never go away.
Other spouses worry about being late for mom's Thanksgiving dinner. Military spouses worry about getting back from Japan in time for dad's funeral.
The television program showing an elderly lady putting a card down in front of a long, black wall that has names on it touches other spouses. The card simply says, "Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. You would have been sixty today." A military spouse is the lady with the card, and the wall is the Vietnam Memorial.
I would NEVER say military spouses are better than other spouses. But I will say there is a difference. I will say, without hesitation, that military spouses pay just as high a price for freedom as do their active duty husbands and wives.
Perhaps the price they pay is even higher. Dying in service to our country isn't near as hard as loving someone who has died in service to our country, and having to live without them.
God bless our military spouses for all they freely give.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
You are a military wife if...
..you can unpack a house and have everything in place in 48 hours
..you string concertina wire to keep the neighbor's kids out of your flower beds
..your husband's work and dress clothes cost more than yours do
..you've changed more oil and mowed more lawns than your husband because he's never there to do it himself
..you use a crook-neck flashlight with a red lens during power outages because it's the only one you can ever find in the house
..your children say "hoo ah" or "roger that" instead of "ok"
..you know that it's normal to light shoe polish on fire and that the best way to spit-shine boots is cotton balls
..your husband does a route recon and takes a GPS for a trip to the mall
..you only write in pencil because EVERYTHING is subject to change
..you need a translator to talk to your civilian friends, only because they have no idea what DFAS, AER, TDY, ACS, NPD, PCS, and ETS mean
..you have a larger selection of curtains than Wal-Mart does
..you can remember where you kept the Scotch tape in your last house, but unfortunately, not in this one
..you mark time in duty stations, not years
..you refer to friends not only by name but by the state that they live in
..you know that "back home" doesn't mean at the house you live in now
..you tear up when you hear "Proud to Be An American," even though you've heard it 50 times by now
..you know that a 2 month separation IS short, no matter what your civilian friends say
..you ALWAYS know when payday is and get ticked off if there are more than 2 weekends during that pay period
..you know better than to go to the PX or commissary between 11:30 and 1:30 unless it's a life or death emergency
..you show your military ID to the greeter at Wal-Mart
..you know that any reference to "sand" or a "box" describes NTC at Ft. Irwin, not your kid's backyard toys
..you know that "Ft. Puke" is a completely accurate description of Ft. Polk
..you find yourself explaining your husband's LES to him
..you have enough camouflage in your house to wallpaper the White House
..you don't have to think about what time 21:30 is
..you've ever been referred to as "Household 6"
..you're the TC, not a backseat driver
..you start ripping open MREs and looking for the M&Ms when you run out of Halloween candy
..you can't remember the last time you saw a doctor who wasn't wearing BDUs
..you've ever had a pet named Scout, Ranger or Sergeant
..the local dry cleaner knows you by your first name
..it only cost you $25 to have a child
..you find that a large number of your clothes and household items are olive drab or loam, even though you never planned it that way
..you pick apart uniforms on TV and in the movies, even though you used to yell at your husband for doing the same thing
..you know what "pogey bait" is and which kinds everyone in your husband's platoon prefers
..you wish you could go to CIF to DX your old stuff like your husband can
..you've learned to sleep through the sounds of tanks, planes, helicopters and artillery simulators
..you give your kids a hand receipt when they take your Tupperware to school
..you can hate military life but be terrified to leave it all in the same breath
..you defend your lifestyle no matter how bad things get because you know there's no other life for you!
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
A Military Spouse's Prayer
Author Unknown
Lord,
Give me the strength of heart to see
The difference in duty and his love for me.
Give me the understanding to know
That when duty calls, he must go.
Give me the patience to know in my heart
That he is serving his country and doing his part.
Give me the strength to carry on
When he's working late or must be gone.
Give me a task to do each day
To fill the time while he is away.
Give me others who can share
The ups and downs and who'll really care.
Give me the wisdom to get me through
When I'm not quite sure of what to do.
And Lord, while our family is here
Keep us healthy, safe and full of cheer.
